The Clans have NO Talent }{ Vote to keep them in!

[wavefur]

There are 10 chapters (10 auiditions) In the end u vote for who wins the title of YOU SUCK OFFICALLY!! ;D

Chapter 1-You won't kill me you bum!

Brackenfur: Welcome! This is The Clans have NO Talent what so ever! Please take a seat and keep your ear protection on at all times...this could get messy if you don't! *fake smile* Presenting the judges, drum roll please!

*random drum roll*

Brackenfur: Presentinggggggggggggg Ashfur, Sorreltail andddddddd Mousefur!!!!

*crowd stays silent* *drum roll is still going on*

Brackenfur: No more drum roll please!

*drum roll continues*

Brackenfur: I SAID NO MORE DRUM ROLL! NO COOKIES FOR A MOOM BERRYNOSE!!!!

*crowd stares*

Brackenfur: *fake smile* Anyyyywayyyyyy, our first auiditionies areeeeeeeee...BRAMBLECLAW AND HAWKFROST assssssssss YOU WONT KILL ME YOU BUM!

*Hawkfrost and Brambleclaw walk out*

Sorreltail: What are you two going to do for us today?

Brambleclaw: *bounces excitedly* A drama performance!!!

*Ashfur buzzes in*

Hawkfrost: What did you do that for?

Ashfur: *mumbling under breath* Took Squirrelflight *eye twitch* Gonna get me killed *eye twitch*

Mousefur: *sighs* Do your stuff boys.

Brambleclaw: *dramatic voice* Hawkfrost! Your working with Tigerstar to kill Firestar aren't you?

Hawkfrost: *casual* Yeah. *shrugs*

Brambleclaw: *all dramatic* Oh my brother, you betrayed me! *sings* How could you? How could you? How could YYYYYOOOOOUUUUU??

Hawkfrost: *looks at paws* It seemed like a good idea at the time, the cookie sugar was really pumping through me...I don't know what came over me...

Brambleclaw: *rushed* I'll have to kill you so you don't kill Firestar and I can be leader in some weird way that I don't yet know coz Erin Hunter hasn't published the book yet and I really want her to hurry up so I can find out.

Hawkfrost: *shouts* YOU WONT KILL ME YOU BUM!!!

Brambleclaw: *turns to judges* Thats as far as we got...

Hawkfrost: I told you we should have gone with the hamburger ending!

Judges:

Mousefur: Why the heck did I agree to this?

[Icestorm]

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD Omg this is hilarious! U BUUUMM! XD

[Wildstar]

LOLLOLNESS

[wavefur]

Thankies you guys...the cookie sugar was really pumping through me when I wrote it...I dont know what came over me! XD

[wavefur]

Chapter 2-SWINE FLU in gangster!

Brackenfur: Sooooooo that was Brambleclaw and Hawkfrost with YOU WONT KILL ME YOU BUM! What do the judges think?

Ashfur: U suck just doesn't fit you two...*evil grin* many other words do...*ashfur has a swearing rant until hawkfrost knocks him out with a rabbit*

Sorreltail: Thank you Hawkfrost. I think your performance, was...well...dynamic?

Mousefur: You suck now leave, come back at the end. *Hawkfrost and Brambleclaw leave*

Brackenfur: Noooowwwww presentinggggggg...You all love her...LEAFPOOL! *Brambleclaw runs back to the front row, shoving Crowfeather off*

Brambleclaw: My seat! *Leafpool comes on stage and Brambleclaw cheers*

Ashfur: *dreamily* So Leafpool what are you going to do for us today? *Brambleclaw shots Ashfur a look through narrowed eyes*

Leafpool: Today I'm going to show everyone what happened to me yeaterday in gangster. *eye twitch*

Sorreltail: Good luck then!

Leafpool: *goes all gangster* Okay guys, heres how it went down. I had this little ginger kit come in to my crib, yeah, the little squirt didn't even call in. Yeah, he well interupted my privacy. I mean I could have been sorting herbs or somethin! Anyways he just came storming in, and he said. *high pitched voice* Leafpool I threw up in the nursery. Mummy sent me to you to see whats wrong. *goes back to gangster voice* I was like O M G what the heck was I supposed to do with a sick kit. So then I sniffed it to see what was wrong the horrific rank just went up me nose. I was almost sick at the stench! Then I knew what the heck the little squirt had *eye twitch, shouts crazily with a weird face* SWINE FLU!!!! *goes back to before* I was O M G! This could like seriously kill, me! So I told the kit he was fine and just to take it easy. It scampered off and I washed myself all over. I mean really? Who the heck sends their stupid ginger kit with *eye twitch, voice and face goes all crazy again* SWINE FLU!!! *back to before* into my crib?

*Brambleclaw looks down awkwardly* *Squirrelflight stands up angrily*

Squirrelflight: EXCUSE ME LEAFPOOL! BUT THATS MY KIT YOUR TALKING ABOUT! YOU LEAVE LIONKIT ALONE YOU *insert swear word here*.

Leapool: ACTUALLY SQUIRRELFLIGHT, YOU LYING SHE CAT, THERE MY KITS! I GAVE THEM TO YOU SO I WOULDN'T BE THROWN OUT. BUT NO ONE WAS SUPPOSED TO KNOW AND NOW THEY DO SO ITS ALL YOUR FAULT!!! *mutters loudly* Somehow Firestar is responisble for this!!

Mousefur: I think that'll do.

Sorreltail: Lets all just pretend we never heard it until Erin Hunter publishes Sunrise and we all know everything.

Ashfur: *stands up* Squirrelflight sit down with your kits which i shall try to murder one day, but I wont now because their my darling Leafpools but of course I dont know that so I might anyway...*fake smiles* *turns to Leafpool and sighs dreamily*

*Leafpool gives him a look like shes gonna be sick*

*Brambleclaw leaps at him*

Brambleclaw: BACK OF B**** SHES MINE!!! *Ashfur and Brambleclaw fight over Leafpool*

Crowfeather: *mutters under his breath* Stuff Nightcloud I might join their Leafpool Lovers Crew.

[Icestorm]

XDDDDDDDDDDDDD GO BRAMBLEY!!!! GO GO GO GO!!

[wavefur]

Yay! Brambley beat him up! Give him a right hander...or should I say a right pawer! X3

[Icestorm]

XDDD You probably should! XD

[Wildstar]

Heehee funnyness!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[wavefur]

XDDD

Thankies Wildstar! =DDD

[wavefur]

Chapter 3-Best Friends and Cookies

Squirrelflight: BRAMBLEY BRAMBLEY KITTY KITTY! STOP FIGHTING WITH ASHY OVER LEAFPOOL! YOUR MINE!!

Brambleclaw: *stops fighting* LEAFPOOL IS SEXIER THAN YOU SO I'M DUMPING YOU! *starts fighting again then stops* AND DONT FORGET TO TAKE YOUR PILL!!!

*Squirrelflight sits down angrily* *Leafpool stands between Ashfur and Brambleclaw*

Ashfur: *sighs dreamily* Oh Leafpool, lets get out of here, I love you soo much. *Leafpool turns to him*

Leafpool: EWWWWW! Never! My sister might be blind when it came to you but I'm not! You UGLY! Brambley is my sexy boy. *pads over to Brambleclaw* Love you hunny bunch!

*Brambleclaw purrs and touches noses with her* *Ashfur sits back down and goes back to sulking*

Brackenfur: Annnyyyyyywayyyyyyyy...Now its time for our third act! Here are three she cats *Ashfur looks interested* who call themselves Best Friends! Presentingggggggggg Spottedleaf, Sandstorm anddddd Cinderpelt!

*Crowd doesn't go wild* *Three she cats come on stage* *Firestar looks from one to the other drooling*

Mousefur: *already fed up* So what are you girls going to do for us today?

Spottedleaf: The Fire Dance, and can I just say Firestar, I Love you the most!

Sandstorm: Wait! I had your kits and I'm loyal to you. *mutters* And if you dump me I'll frickin kill you!

Cinderpelt: You know I'm your favourite, all the warrior fans say so!

Mousefur: *angry* Will you PLEASE get on with it! *random weird music starts and they start dancing*

*Sandstorm winks at Firestar as she dances and takes centre stage* *Spottedleaf shoves her away and takes her place* *Cinderpelt walks off the stage to sit next to him*

Cinderpelt: I love you more than I love dancing.

*Firestar gives her a confused look* *Cinderpelt rolls her eyes*

Cinderpelt: Cookies.

Firestar: *gets excited* Yay! I love you!

*Spottedleaf and Sandstorm stop dancing with their mouths open* *Cinderpelt and Firestar twine tails and enjoy cookies together*

Spottedleaf: *pouts* Thats not fair! She cheated!

Sandstorm: *eye twitch* Had...his...kits *eye twitch*...lost him...over...cookies...*eye twitch*

Sorreltail: Let me get this straight, you all came on here to impress Firestar? *they all nod* And Cinderpelt won because she has cookies? *they all nod again* Thats going to be a long lasting relationship...how many cookies have you got?

Cinderpelt: Only five.

Firestar: Firestar want more cookies.

Cinderpelt: I haven't got anymore.

Firestar: I dump you then.

Ashfur: Hey ladies, ladies. Never mind him check me out! Ashy is in the house.



Spottedleaf: EWW, KILL IT!

[Icestorm]

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD ROFL LMAO LOL AND ANY OTHER PHRASE!

[wavefur]

Thankies Icy!

[Icestorm]

[Wildstar]

goooo AHSFUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

COOKIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GO CINDERPELT!