Post by ;;Spots <3 on Jun 14, 2008 22:52:27 GMT -5
Title; Torn
Chapters; 1
Author; Er... me xD
Pairing; LeafpoolxCrowfeather
Rating; General
Spoilers; Not really; just make sure you've read the last few books of The New Prophecy.
Summary; The stars had brought them together, the world has torn them apart... Leafpool and Crowfeather love each other, but the Warrior Code says they can't. Hear Leafpool's anguished thoughts as she thinks about the tom she loves.
Warning; --
Disclaimer; I do not own Warriors, ect.
Beta; Snowflight [thanks! ^^]
Cover; Might make one later. -shrugs-
Author's Notes; Reviews are appreciated! =]
Every time I hear his name, I remember I wasn't the first. Every time I see him with that black she-cat, I remember I wasn't the last. Every time I see his kits, wandering around the moorland of WindClan, I remember he didn't love me enough.
Why do I feel this way? I'm a medicine cat - I'm not supposed to love! And yet, I can't stop the painful throb in my heart every time I see him; my silent cries remain unanswered and I yearn for him more and more. I can't stop thinking about him... Everywhere I look, everywhere I turn, all I see is him - I am reminded of what could have been and what is now, and my longing for him increases until I can't bear it any longer. Scarcely do I finish thinking this when I scold my traitorous thoughts and my loyalty to my clan overpowers my individual needs.
That's why I gave him up to begin with - my clan. My clan, my family, my promise to StarClan - they're the only things keeping me from running back to him. My heart isn't as important as my duty to ThunderClan; at least, it shouldn't be. Those reasons used to be enough, enough to keep my emotions under control for the most part, but that's starting to change. I'm not sure it's enough anymore.
It's like a part of me is missing - and he's the only one that can make me whole again. Whenever I see him, it hurts so much I almost can't stand it, especially when he's with Nightcloud. And what's worse is the hostility he shows toward me now, as if he blames me for being true to my clan - for leaving him. But I can also see the pain in his eyes, like he misses me too. At least, I hope he does. Even if he does, it doesn't matter. We can't ever be together. We can't ever be true to our feelings without abandoning everything we know - like we almost did before when I told him I couldn't do it. If I had the chance to leave everything behind again and just be with him, would I take it? Could I do it? I... I just don't know.
Oh, I wish there was a way for us to be together! StarClan, why do you torture me so? I wish the pain would just go away.
Maybe I wasn't meant to be a medicine cat... If I can't control my feelings for him, maybe I wasn't meant to walk this path. Is my life just a tangle of lies? StarClan, just show me the way! Please, I don't know how long I can take this anymore. Why does this have to be so hard? Can't someone show me what I should do? Isn't there anything I can do to ease the pain? I've tried to forget him, to get him out of my mind, but I can't; I'm not strong enough.
All I know is that we can't be together - I can't love him. Simple, right? I wish it was. Oh, how I wish it was as easy as that...
Chapters; 1
Author; Er... me xD
Pairing; LeafpoolxCrowfeather
Rating; General
Spoilers; Not really; just make sure you've read the last few books of The New Prophecy.
Summary; The stars had brought them together, the world has torn them apart... Leafpool and Crowfeather love each other, but the Warrior Code says they can't. Hear Leafpool's anguished thoughts as she thinks about the tom she loves.
Warning; --
Disclaimer; I do not own Warriors, ect.
Beta; Snowflight [thanks! ^^]
Cover; Might make one later. -shrugs-
Author's Notes; Reviews are appreciated! =]
Every time I hear his name, I remember I wasn't the first. Every time I see him with that black she-cat, I remember I wasn't the last. Every time I see his kits, wandering around the moorland of WindClan, I remember he didn't love me enough.
Why do I feel this way? I'm a medicine cat - I'm not supposed to love! And yet, I can't stop the painful throb in my heart every time I see him; my silent cries remain unanswered and I yearn for him more and more. I can't stop thinking about him... Everywhere I look, everywhere I turn, all I see is him - I am reminded of what could have been and what is now, and my longing for him increases until I can't bear it any longer. Scarcely do I finish thinking this when I scold my traitorous thoughts and my loyalty to my clan overpowers my individual needs.
That's why I gave him up to begin with - my clan. My clan, my family, my promise to StarClan - they're the only things keeping me from running back to him. My heart isn't as important as my duty to ThunderClan; at least, it shouldn't be. Those reasons used to be enough, enough to keep my emotions under control for the most part, but that's starting to change. I'm not sure it's enough anymore.
It's like a part of me is missing - and he's the only one that can make me whole again. Whenever I see him, it hurts so much I almost can't stand it, especially when he's with Nightcloud. And what's worse is the hostility he shows toward me now, as if he blames me for being true to my clan - for leaving him. But I can also see the pain in his eyes, like he misses me too. At least, I hope he does. Even if he does, it doesn't matter. We can't ever be together. We can't ever be true to our feelings without abandoning everything we know - like we almost did before when I told him I couldn't do it. If I had the chance to leave everything behind again and just be with him, would I take it? Could I do it? I... I just don't know.
Oh, I wish there was a way for us to be together! StarClan, why do you torture me so? I wish the pain would just go away.
Maybe I wasn't meant to be a medicine cat... If I can't control my feelings for him, maybe I wasn't meant to walk this path. Is my life just a tangle of lies? StarClan, just show me the way! Please, I don't know how long I can take this anymore. Why does this have to be so hard? Can't someone show me what I should do? Isn't there anything I can do to ease the pain? I've tried to forget him, to get him out of my mind, but I can't; I'm not strong enough.
All I know is that we can't be together - I can't love him. Simple, right? I wish it was. Oh, how I wish it was as easy as that...
